wtf

wonder woman lunch box

Daniel and Sarah may think they’re decent parents, but it turns out they were exposing their daughter to horribly violent images and ideas by letting her carry a Wonder Woman lunchbox.

Luckily, their daughter’s school stepped in and put an end to that. They sent a note home with the OBVIOUS HOOLIGAN CHILD that clearly told them she can’t bring the hideous piece of warmongering propaganda pictured above back to school.

Clearly, Wonder Woman is a danger to children because she’s a superhero and superheroes are just false idols promoting violence.

Y’know, I’d be outraged about this, but I’m honestly too gobsmacked to even work up the energy to be mad.

Read the note and see another picture of the offending lunchbox after the break.

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We can only assume McDonald’s employee Garrett either really needs money (he does work at McDonald’s after all), or really needs attention – because he was willing to lick a grease trap for $5. As if that wasn’t enough, he did it twice.

That’s a whopping $2.50 per lick. I wouldn’t lick a grease trap for anything under $50. I have standards.

Watch the grossness after the jump.

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Before today I would have said that a banana night light is preposterous. Now I feel like everyone should have a banana night light.

The manufacturer also feels it’s important for you to know that it “Even stands of it’s own accord. Now that’s absolutely ‘nanas.”

Check out another pic after the break…

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Two teens in Australia bought this McDonald’s burger for a friend in 1995, but the friend didn’t show up. So, instead of finding its way into someone else’s stomach or the trash, it was stored… for 20 freaking years. There are plenty stories about old McDonald’s burgers floating around the Internet, but this one might be the oldest. As you might have guessed, it is also completely bereft of mold.

It is now rock hard and lives in a padlocked wooden box. Imagine the surprise of some future treasure hunter who digs that sucker up.

If this wasn’t weird enough, the duo recorded a song called “Free The Burger” that explains the whole story. Check it out after the break along with an additional pic.

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Cheeseburger-Mask

I’m not sure why you’d want to wear a giant cheeseburger head mask, but if you’re ever invited to some burger themed soireè or you want to do a video like the cartoons we watched as kids where people turned into food, now you can with this Cheeseburger Head Mask.

Yeah, I got nothing. But to each his own, right?

If you want one but you’re not sure about being able to see, it does have eye holes and fits most adult heads.

Product Page: ($39.99 via Geek Alerts)

scopion pizza

Scorpion pizza will be available at the Calgary Stampede this July.

(CBC via Nerdcore)

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Waynesboro, Georgia is heading for a whole new identity thanks to a 7 foot tall KFC bucket that mysteriously showed up in a woman’s front yard last Thursday. The phantom bucket subsequently appeared on Facebook and the local news, turning it into a popular landmark – the woman’s landlord even claims that he will have it mounted on a pole for the world to see. Needless to say, the misleading ad will likely result in a lot of pissed off, chicken-starved passers by who will have to trek more than five additional miles to get the Colonel’s nearest location.

Check out the news report after the jump.

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frito lay man

(via Tosh.0)

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If there’s a weird nonsensical product that comes in colorful packaging and has a face, chances are it originated in Japan. Case in point: this bizarre candy that allows you to eat a candy sewage explosion that looks like the result of Stay Puft Marshmallow Man’s Mexican food bender.

You snap together a plastic toilet, give it a happy cartoon face with the enclosed sticker (because nothing says happiness like receiving huge dumps daily), then add water to the magic sh*t-powder, and presto! A simulated plumbing accident that you can eat.

MMMMMMMMMMMM!! Hit the jump for a demo vid.

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There’s a new ipecac soda available from Lester’s Fixins which is flavored like, of all things, ranch dressing. Somewhere, someone will pour this over a salad, but will it make the flavor any less disgusting? Probably not.

(via TCD)